Mel, I would like to know why it is that Christian’s fear confrontation. We are told in the Bible to be truthful. Yet, what I see, hear and experience myself, consistently, is that Christians will smooth over everything in order to keep things quiet and easy.
To me, this shelves airing out your grievances, builds frustration, blocks communication; in short it does not develop a healthy community or individual. It does not assist in our truly loving our brothers and sisters; it definitely does not show to others outside the Christian community how we will be known by our love.
My recently adopted attitude and behavior, is now, in order to fit in, that I say nothing to anyone; hold the truth inside myself….because no one wants to hear it.
Hence, we have no open and honest communication where we can air our differences, or speak our mind without being judged or condemned…and..the most important point…we therefore cannot love as Jesus calls us to.
Why oh why can we not be honest and open?
Dear Open and Honest:
Oh if only I had the answer! I see the same things. I wonder if some of it isn’t taught by society. It’s not okay to say anything that could possibly upset anyone anymore. It is hard to confront with truth because it is such a delicate area. If you are too confrontational it puts the other person on defense and they are very unlikely to hear anything you have to say. Are we afraid of making someone feel uncomfortable or angry? I think so. I don’t know where the line should be drawn. Who decides what should be addressed and what should not? And there are always those people who will take that sense of power to an unhealthy level because they feel they have the right to tell anyone and everyone how they should live, what they should wear, and how to behave etc. That’s dangerous territory. If it can be done with a pure and loving heart then we’d confront like Jesus. We have to be prepared for the consequences that may follow. I’ve had to do it in a leadership position and it is really hard and the person on the receiving end isn’t always willing or ready to listen.
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