I have a problem with my mother who lives in the same town I do. She shows up unannounced all the time and loves to just take over my house or dealing with my kids. I have tried telling her she cannot just show up but it does no good. Even when I have tried to tell her she cannot come into my home she will just push past me. It’s causing problems in my marriage. She drives my husband crazy. I need some advice!
Dear Mother Trouble:
You have probably already tried this but it’s time to sit down with your husband and your mom and lay down the rules. She is not allowed to show up unannounced any longer or you will not be answering the door. If she has a key to your house, you might change the locks. You are going to have to be firm with her if you’ve done this before because she may not take you seriously. It’s not okay for her to be barging into your home or into your family. I’m sure she means well and maybe she’s lonely but if you don’t find a way to make her understand, she is going to continue to behave this way. If she continues to come unannounced after you talk to her, then perhaps you need to meet with her again with your pastor. She may not take you seriously.
If she shows up unannounced after your discussion with her, don’t answer the door. You may have to lock all your doors for a while. Put a note on the front door that says you are spending time with your family and are not welcoming unannounced visitors at this time. You’re going to have to be firm and consistent if you want your mom to take you seriously. Good luck!
Do you have some advice to share with “Overbearing Mother”? Please feel free to leave comments below and share your wisdom and experience.
If you have a question for the weekly Dear Mel column, please use the Dear Mel tab and fill in the form!