So do not be afraid of them. There is nothing concealed that will not be disclosed, or hidden that will not be made known. Matthew 10:26
It took a long time to get here. A journey I didn't want to be a part of. Not the life or journey my parents had imagined as my mom rubbed her swollen belly or kissed my newborn cheeks. My heart wasn't intended to be broken or my four year old mind changed for good, but it happened. It happened to me and it happens to so many.
Discussing abuse makes people uncomfortable. All victims know this. I have been told, "Why did you share that?" "Why would you tell someone about that?"
When folks hear about my book, many eyes get wide and you can see the discomfort cross their face. Many don't want to know about it and they certainly don't want to be part of any ministry that deals with sexual abuse. It's too icky. It's not something they want to have to think about. It's too awful.
I agree. It is all those things and more.
Too bad some of us don't get that choice. Because it's there. The scar is there and it's permanent. No amount of laser treatment will fully remove it. Jesus healed it but He told me not to forget.
Don't forget because there are others who need to heal. Need to feel loved and to be understood. There's a need and it's huge. It could be a huge burden but Christ says His burden is light. My love for Jesus is a gift. My abuse is now a gift.
Yes, a gift.
Because my heart connects to those who will be told to be quiet. To shut up. To not shame the family. For those who will lose their family because they speak up. For those who think they can never be whole. For those hearts that just long daily for someone, just someone who loves and understands them. For someone to listen. To truly hear them.
My eyes can't turn away from it. My heart can't clam up and my mind cannot pretend it doesn't exist. My heart bleeds in agony over lost innocence and torment. The physical signs heal but the mental torment and anguish, they last and aren't easily broken.
The enemy wants to silence the abused. To keep her/him quiet. Silence breeds guilt, discontentment, and torture. Silence spreads the lies. Silence abuses another child. Silence cannot be tolerated. Silence is satan's handy work. He loves it.
Are you uncomfortable yet? Good. You should be. Sexual abuse should make every single person uncomfortable. Maybe you aren't called to help the abused. I get that. But never silence an abuse victim. The shushing further victimizes.
We didn't ask to be tortured and molested. We didn't ask to be threatened to be killed or beaten for someone's sick sexual gratification. We didn't ask to have this rolling around in our minds, taunting us with it's sickness.
God's word says to bring the darkness to light. That is how we will stop sexual abuse. You want to give a woman back a smidgen of what she's lost? Give her back her voice. Set her voice free!
Telling my story has been scary. It's taken me down some dark paths. Thank God for his flashlights. But it's been worth it. Every aspect of it. I wouldn't change it. I know that might sound crazy but it's the story God gave me. It's worth the hearts that have experienced miracles. Lives that thought they'd never move beyond the boulder that rides on the heart and feels permanent.
Because my story is the voice of millions. And it won't be silent.
This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. John 3:19
If you are someone you know has been abused, my book, How I Forgave My Molester may help. The paperback is only $5.49 - join the hundreds of women who are finding their freedom and regaining their voice!