I Don’t Have It All Together

Whoever loves money never has money enough; whoever loves wealth is never satisfied with his income. This too is meaningless.  Ecc 5:10

I know at times, I will read someone else’s blog or story and think, “Wow, I wish I had all of that!” or “I wish I looked, wrote, dressed, had hair, etc like her.”  We as women do this all the time.

It’s a dangerous mind game we play.  I’m never going to have pretty, straight blond hair, even if I might wish for it for just a day or a moment.  I’m not going to be taller or have bluer eyes.  These thoughts are truly a waste of my time and yet, they flutter in like lost seedlings and sometimes begin to take root as weeds in my heart and mind.  At least until I pluck them individually or get out the round-up and just hose those suckers down, dead.

I don’t have it all together.  I yell at my kids, get super frustrated, have days where my husband and I aren’t very kind to each other, let a swear word fly now and then, and can’t make rice (hah I bet you laughed at that one, it’s true but I can cook).  I don’t have this Christian thing all figured out.  I still have lots of questions, which doesn’t mean I am insecure in my faith but instead that I’m still hungry and excited for His answers and love digging for them.  Turning up juicy tidbits and surprises all the time.  I think that totally rocks!

I want God to keep rocking my socks!  I want to continue to be a student of His word and being thrilled by the discoveries.  I don’t want a complacent faith, where I think I have all the answers and no reason to open my bible.  I don’t want to become so entranced by my own feelings of righteousness, that I can no longer ponder another’s thoughts and beliefs, even if ultimately we disagree.

Faith shouldn’t become stagnant.  It can and it does but only if we allow it.  Do not allow yourself to become bored with the Word.  Don’t get focused on what you don’t have and what others do seem to have in their hands.

When you see me post exciting news, please know, I’m not bragging.  I am just in utter shock and amazed that God could use even me, to be a part of His work.  I’ve always wanted to be a missionary but that isn’t in our cards now and may never be.  My mission field is here.  Online, in my home, in my life.  Here with my sweet readers who bless my heart each and everyday. For me, that is more than enough.  Because it is unlikely I will become the next Karen Kingsbury, and that’s okay.  Let where you are right now, be enough.

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.  Proverbs 31:30


  1. None of us have it all together! That is probably the one lesson I’ve learned as I’ve grown older: everybody has issues! It’s kind of comforting in a strange way, to know that we are not the only ones who are not “together”. You’re in good company!

    And we don’t need another Karen Kingsbury! God has a niche especially for you! I admire your hunger for the Lord and your seeking after Him! He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him. God bless!!!!
    Kimberly recently posted..But I dont know how to write a book!!!!

    • Thank you Kimberly and I’m so glad when I read how others don’t have it all together. If we put down our masks and let everyone see who we really are, I think it would change the world 🙂 Get rid of the facades!

  2. I can’t remember how I found my way to your blog, but I can tell this: God’s got you on the fast track!! He’s doing things through you and for you that’s apparent to your readers. I wouldn’t be surprised at all to one day see “By Melinda Todd” on shiny new covers at the bookstore!! I love your heart!!

  3. I love that: “Let where you are right now be enough.” That is SO difficult most days, but it’s key.

    Lord, help me to flourish right where you’ve planted me!
    Kate {The Parchment Girl} recently posted..Guest Post A Romp Through the Deep South

  4. We are in good company over here in our cozy little neck of the internet woods 🙂 I think you spilled what is very similarly in each of our hearts. I just try to use all of my worldly insecurities to fuel the fire of my God-given security… it’s a constant turning it and burning it and there seems to be an awesome rate on my return! God is so good! I was just reading some quotes by Jim Elliot and this one fits quite nicely with your post… “Wherever you are – be all there.”

    And, so what if you’re not the next Karen Kingsbury… you’re better…. You Are MEL, a girl with story and God who leads her confidently into the lives of whoever He chooses and I for one am glad to be one of those chosen!
    Heidi recently posted..What I Wished Someone Told Me About Dating

    • Heidi, you are too sweet! 🙂 I’m so glad to have so many in my corner cheering me on! That makes it all worth the time and effort 🙂

  5. It’s nice to know that there are other “Women of God” out there that aren’t pretending to be the Proverbs 31 woman with every breath they take…I am much like you, a work constantly in progress, though I can make rice 😉 haha!!! It is refreshing to see there are others who aren’t pretending to have it all together…when I get it “all” together…I imagine I’ll be on the streets of Glory, until then…I’ll be gathering it all together 🙂

    • Yes, isn’t it a blessing to hear other women fess up about messing up? There’s a relief that overcomes us when we realize we’re not alone! Thank you for your sweet comment and I added you to the email list for Uncertain Life 🙂

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