Hidden Secrets – Dear Family, I NEED Help!

Dear Family:
I need help! I need a break from the kids like you can’t even imagine. My husband isn’t home enough to provide it because he’s off earning money to support his family. Why is it so hard for you guys to want to help me out? You help my brother but ignore me completely. I find myself being slightly envious of my friend whose a single mom because her parents take the kids for her all the time and then her ex takes them. She has more free time on her hands than anyone I know. Then I have this large family and no one ever offers to help. I don’t get it. Do you hate my kids? I’m so exhausted. Just a few hours would be amazing. But I know that’s not going to happen.
~ The Loser Sister ~

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  1. Oh, I can relate to this. Here’s what I’ve come to realize. Good friends are willing to help. Do a child swap if you can. And if your family doesn’t want to take your kids, your kids are probably better off NOT hanging with family that doesn’t really want them. We don’t have any family help either. Friends have been our saving grace. I’m sorry that your fam helps your bro and not you. I never get that. The kids know they are being left out and how unfair to them? I myself can’t wait to have grandbabies that I can spoil AND give my children a break. But I guess not everyone is into being a grandparent or aunt/uncle etc. I will pray you find some relief. Ask around at church. There’s help to be found.

  2. This is a hard one, but Mel has some good thoughts for you to consider. If they don’t want to help they are probably not the influence you children should be around anyway. Some places to check, depending on the ages of your children, could be church groups, preschool and before/after school programs, some community groups and YWCA/YMCA have “Mom Breaks” where you have a few hours for you. Check in your community, or start one with some other Mom’s you know. Everyone takes a turn with the children, when they can, and it gives everyone a break. I do that for a friend who has three children, I take them when she has to do shopping so she doesn’t have to load/unload/load/unload x 3 every store. My son gets friends to come and play, she gets a break. It works wonderfully. Praying for you.

  3. We are all facing trials. How we perceive them is as important as how we react.

    I agree with Melinda seek out the help you cannot get from your family.

    I wish I had a husband. I wish I had a bigger family. Instead it is just my daughter and I. Child support is spotty and the time my daughter spends with her father is marred by the drama he puts me through.

    A friend and mentor of mine is a mom of 6. Her second born has Downs Syndrome and at 20 years of age still lives at home and is probably as mature as she will ever be. This means the parents will likely always be taking care of her. The dad works out of town for days at a time.

    We all have our crosses to bear. Sometimes it is just a season we are passing through. My daughter was way demanding as a toddler in a way that she barely is as a teen now.

  4. I have felt this same way, jealous of the divorced mom’s who get every other weekend off. Trust that they are jealous of you too. Nobody has it easier-we all struggle. But do find some friends or family to help you out. Ever mom needs a break.

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