Controlling People or God? Who Gets The Vote?

Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.  Luke 6:37

When I think of controlling people I instinctively react with an intense feeling of rebellion.  How many of us have had controlling people in our lives that just evoked a negative response in us instantly? How often do we allow others to control us, even now?

Too often. I worry about what I share here and how others will take it.

If I share this with them, is someone going to make a nasty comment, unlike my page, or tell the world I’m a bad person?

When this thought crosses my mind, I take it to prayer.  Really there’s only one voice that gets the ultimate voice and a vote.  If He says no or not right now, then it doesn’t get published.

An example of others being controlling (oh and don’t think that I don’t know I can fall into this category too) is today a precious Christian blogger received some negative comments because of the brand of sweatshirt she wore in a sweet picture of her and her husband.  A sweatshirt!

Which leads me to think, gee it’s no wonder we women are so very critical and hard on ourselves. We know there is someone out there completely missing our message and only seeing the outsides. Not only that, this Christian writer is gorgeous, inside and out.  Yet, the focus was on her appearance and not her words.

Where and when do we draw the line when others try to control us?  If all someone notices is my double chin or the name brand clothing I’m wearing (or not wearing in my case, as in generics, I’m not a nudist), my pimples, freckles and/or fair skin instead of my heart or the message I write, then perhaps it’s not me with the issue.  God doesn’t only call the name brand clothes wearing, perfect skin, teeth, hair, eyes type of women to encourage believers.  He calls us all.  Yes, all.  Every.  Single.  One.  Of.  Us.

So stop letting others control you and let the One who chose you and bore your sins for you have the final say.  I challenge you to take a deeper look within yourself the next time you react negatively (whether in your head or not) to someone else because of an outward appearance.  Because if you’re looking at their outside, it’s not even about them. It’s about you and your own hang-ups. You need to take that to the Lord.

Wisdom from Thumper, “If you can’t say something nice… don’t say nothing at all.”

* Stepping off my soap box now*


  1. Very good advice on both ends! I think when we keep the focus on ourselves and our relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ, everything falls into place. And if someone wants to make fun of clothing…you can send the over to my blog and they can have a feast:->


  2. Excellently written!! And what a good word to share with all of our sisters. I have come to know this: I refuse to accept responsibility for the reactions of others when my actions are free of malice.

  3. Carole in the UK

    Great post Mel, I understand totally, where you are coming from with this.

    I have been praying recently over this same issue of controlling people ( it also includes myself )
    I have finally drawn a line in the sand and declared that the Word of God is final authority in my life! This has so freed me from negative energy and people in my life.

    Blessings to you and your family.


    I have so enjoyed finding your blog this last week or so – you write thoughtfully and honestly, something I am coming to deeply appreciate as I wade through the waters of early retirement. Thanks for your good work.

  5. Thanks for posting this- there are just so many of us that need to hear this!

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