Baggage.
We all come fully equipped with our own. Some comes in a complete and lovely set while others are tattered, torn, and mismatched. We may try to gussy it up with some pretty ribbons and bedazzle it but in the end, the inside is as ugly as a festering pimple and sometimes, it spills and seeps into the outer appearance.
We drag it behind us everywhere we go, leaving a sticky, stinky, and messy trail behind. Some are completely oblivious to the mess they leave behind and continue to drag their nastiness around, contaminating everything they come into contact with. Others are fully aware of the disaster that follows them and in order to keep the peace, they spend all their time on their knees with antibacterial wipes, scrubbing and disinfecting so they don’t upset anyone.
I have mine. Over the years, I have gone back and forth between being a scrubber and becoming oblivious. I came fully loaded with my bags, I didn’t leave anything behind! I am pretty sure there was a kitchen sink in there too.
I have a very serious abandonment issue. I have come to realize over the past few years that I tend to push my husband pretty hard when we have an argument. How far can I really push before he leaves me? Sick and twisted? Yes. Uncommon. Not at all.
I also want to be protected. I want someone to stand up for me when someone’s not being very nice or treating me poorly. I remember one boy who teased me in high school. He asked me if I got black eyes when I ran (you can figure that one out). My husband was my boyfriend when this happened and he was with me. Nothing was said in response to this rude kid but I remember how much I longed for my boyfriend to set him straight.
I have become fully aware of the things that have brought these feelings into my life. What I am more fully aware of is that everyone has their own stuff. We may not understand why a certain friend or acquaintance reacts the way they do in certain circumstances. There is always a reason and often, we don’t truly know what that is.
The next time you feel slighted by someone or have a strong reaction to someone else. Ask yourself why you are reacting this way. Is it because of your own baggage? Is it possible that the other person is also dealing with something and reacts a certain way because of baggage they haven’t quite let go of?
I fully believe that the things that have been placed in my life are so I can learn from them and help others. None of us get through life unscathed. You’ll find as you dig deeper and get to know others better, those who you would never guess, have made it through somethings in life that they barely survived. It makes us who we are and if allowed, can really effect how we deal and cope with others.
God works ALL things for good . That doesn’t mean that everything that has happened to you is good. What it does mean, is that God can use that icky thing and create something good from it.
If you are struggling with heavy baggage, I urge you to bring it into the light. Seek the freedom that comes from Christ. In doing so, you may help one other person who thought they were alone in their heavy burden. Christ will use you to love someone else through their junk, if you let Him. But first, you have the right to seek that help for yourself.
Genesis 50:20
As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present result, to preserve many people alive.
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