My family won’t let my past stay in the past. I was young and stupid and did things I now regret. That was over 10 years ago! I’ve been clean and sober almost 10 years but some family members think I’m still that same girl and they treat me like crap and bring it up like it happened yesterday or like I’m still a user. What do I do? My mom is one of these people. You’d think she’d be happy for me but she’s not.
~Cleaned Up My Act ~
Dear Cleaned Up My Act:
It sounds like it’s time to have a sit down with each family member and talk this out. I might suggest doing it individually so that you don’t end up feeling ganged up on. Explain to them that while you did have a sordid past, it’s in the past and you have grown-up and moved on and they need to move on from that too.
Stay calm and only state the facts. Ask them to forgive you for your past and to please let you now live in the present. Pray fervently before you approach them to ask to meet together and more so before the meeting. If they are also believers, ask to open in prayer before you start talking.
I am praying your family can see who you are now and not who you were.
* Legal disclaimer: Dear Mel is not professional advice but for entertainment purposes only. Melinda Todd, nor her readers, is not legally liable for actions taken by participating parties. Professional help should always be sought. Dear Mel is opinion only. The advice is not legal, medical, or otherwise and is not to replace advice from a doctor, attorney, or other legal authority.
*Dear Mel is an old column. No longer accepting submissions for dear Mel. You are welcome to email me with any question though!